In Thoughts

In thoughts
Of years
In memories
I cannot find
I know you are there
With pain I admit
That I do not recall
Times I should never have forgotten

It was my choice
I carry the pain
But I am not the only one that suffers

— GLB

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it is here

it is here, on this page
that I tell stories
about the man I used to be

it is here, on this page
where I put the words
about the woman
that takes my breath away

it is here, on this page
that I draw images
of booming sparks
and shooting stars

it is here, on this page
that I profess my love for you

it is here, on this page
that I have created a space
for us to gather our everythings
and show them all to the world

— GLB

How can I fix you?

she puts her arms
all the way
around me
shaking from the sobbing
we stand there
in the silent hallway

whispering into my chest,
haltingly,
“how can I fix you?”
um….
“how can I bring you back?”
even then she knew something was gone
“how…..”

(can anyone have ever cried so hard
about something no one knows anything ABOUT?)

whispering into the top of her head,
“I can’t tell from in here”
tapping my chest
tapping my head
“I’ll need to rely on you”
tapping her head
tapping her chest
“and any others you care to bring on”

— GLB

within/without

I am
completely spread out
in this tiny circle
pushing aside
these accouterments
of a life spent…

only to pull more out,
that is how I manage
to feel empty,
filling shelves
and boxes
with things that are
worth anything
only to me

this all exists in trillions
upon trillions
of instances,
not a single one
getting it just right

I just chose the one
closest to my truth,
wondering aimlessly
trying to match
the within
to the
without

— GLB

When I Wasn’t Looking

Brought to me when I wasn’t looking
I caught you out of the corner of my eye
You were glancing away and spinning
Spending way too long in the back of my mind

Just
Just
Just

Come back around
So you can see the joy on my face
So you can take these two tracks
….listening to your mind’s content

Come back around
So I can talk to you some more
So I can get to know that girl, I knew, again

Brought to me when I wasn’t looking
Found before I knew what was happening
I’m not a betting man
But, I dove right in with all my heart

— GLB

7 Minutes

Originally written 3-17-2018

PART I

There is a blank space
Not a slate to draw plans on
No foundation,
Not a place for hope or dreams
There is no starting place
No ending place, either
A middle space
Before the end
After the beginning,
I search for
The calm
A darkness
I pull back nothing,
An absence
That not even light can escape

PART II

There is an empty space
Not a window
Not a floor
There is no port of egress
Not even a door
There have been times
I passed this place
Never knowing it was here
I was headed somewhere different
With a plan in my mind
Looking for something different
Not a hint of where I would land

PART III

Spoken plainly…

There was no empty space
To go when I died
There was no tunnel
No bright white light
I did not experience anything
On this I can go no further
There is nowhere to go
For 7 minutes I was gone,
But I didn’t go anywhere

— GLB