I Weep

I weep
when I get the chance
when it is proper
when it is true

I weep
when I need you
when you aren’t here
when I picture your smile

I weep
at the drop of a hat
when it doesn’t seem warranted
when I am happy

I weep
when I experience vicariously
when I am wrong
when I am right

I weep
because I am human
because I feel
for the sake of weeping

I weep
because I know the ending
because I am in pain
because there is no antidote

I weep
at personal triumphs
at goodbyes
at the first sign of kismet

I weep
when I am trapped
when I don’t understand
when I see the forest

I weep
when I’m on the right track
when I am frustrated
when I can’t keep my eye on the ball

I weep
when I examine my life
when I feel broken
when I can’t see the next step

I weep
on St. Patrick’s Day
when I have let you down
because I miss you

I weep
Because I am at home
Because you are too
Because 3172 miles

I weep
When I open a box of your things
When they still smell like you
Because I can’t put you away

I weep
Because that song is stuck in my head
Because I don’t want it to stop
Because it stopped

— GLB

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Dad

There is no place to begin
Except…
He has been there
At all of my beginnings
Too many to list
Though, all of them have meant my life
To me
A firm place to push off from
A gentle place to land
When I hover or falter
Then fall,
A constant continual
Voice of encouragement
Helping me brush myself off
And try again
Through everything he has been there
My constant companion
Pushing me to be
My best
Not for him
For me

— GLB

7 Minutes

Originally written 3-17-2018

PART I

There is a blank space
Not a slate to draw plans on
No foundation,
Not a place for hope or dreams
There is no starting place
No ending place, either
A middle space
Before the end
After the beginning,
I search for
The calm
A darkness
I pull back nothing,
An absence
That not even light can escape

PART II

There is an empty space
Not a window
Not a floor
There is no port of egress
Not even a door
There have been times
I passed this place
Never knowing it was here
I was headed somewhere different
With a plan in my mind
Looking for something different
Not a hint of where I would land

PART III

Spoken plainly…

There was no empty space
To go when I died
There was no tunnel
No bright white light
I did not experience anything
On this I can go no further
There is nowhere to go
For 7 minutes I was gone,
But I didn’t go anywhere

— GLB

Things Fail

It is horrific
To have things fail
In part, or completely,
What’s worse…
Experiencing it
While it is happening
Knowing it is happening
And not being able to
Do a thing about it

But that is not all

Then comes the shame
Then comes the regret
Then comes the embarrassment
Then comes the wondering
Looking them in the face
Did you see me?
Did you catch that SLIP?

Have I been discovered?

— GLB

Speak

Speak
Use your voice
Use your words
Go everywhere
You ever want to go

Take me there
Show me what
I have been missing
Through the strains
Of your prose

Sing
Use your rock
Use your soul
Create a new universe
Don’t be afraid to go

Pull me into you
Show me the heartbeat
Of your sun
Let me feel
Your dark attraction
Fill my skies with
Sparks and stars

Make me yours
And I will be
Without question

— GLB

Survive

When the copper stops buzzing in your brain
And the sweat pours down your neck
I will be there to hold you when the spasm begins

The application of pain is the measure
Tolerance raises the bar for the next
It’s hard to tell where the victory lies
The strange attractors have done their damage

Down deep, enveloped in gloom
Cast by the only bulb in the cavernous hall
You prepare to put on your show,
Daring to expose all in attendance
As patrons of the darkest art of all

You mime kindness
Whisper intimacy
Talk of hope
Shriek out love

The cacophony deafens
Voices drawn tight
Refusing to admit
That the one thing they have in common…
(Humanity)
Is the hardest thing
To achieve

— GLB

A Kiss

If if were real
And I could hold it in your hand
That would be a blessing
For my reality

When you become actual
A little at a time
I can kiss tiny pieces
Until you are whole

As time draws circles
Around our embrace
Slowly tightening it’s grasp,
I rejoice amidst the pressure
Squeezing us into one

When when has space
Enough to breathe
I inhale deeply
Filling my entire being
With you

Now is then
When we first were we
Fighting through a wave
For something
We might have known
Would set us on a path
To somewhere
We still exist

I stay awake all week
Dreaming of you
And when we finally meet
Those words
That changed our course
Forever
A kiss

— GLB