It Happened

It has to have happened
One time
Someone believed
The story I was telling
Someone picked me up
Looked into my eyes
And saw that
I was still there

It has to have happened
One time
Someone saw past
The gibberish
I was speaking
To an empty chair
And put their arms
Around me
So I wouldn’t have to
Go through it alone

It has to have happened
One time
I sat and stared
Out the window
Trying to convince myself
That I had
A place in this world
And someone
Encouraged me
To take inventory
Of my life
To look at everything
That is inside
To be proud
Of who I am

It has to have happened
One time
You took a chance
On loving me
Wholly
Giving me
A place to rest
Something to count on
The ability
To be free

It has happened
Over and over again
I fall asleep
And wake up
Knowing that
You are with me
Holding my hand
A kiss on my cheek
Smiling with me
Feeling more love
Than ever before

— GLB

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red mist and ether

But the thing is…

I awoke from a conversation
I was having with myself
With no idea where it started
With no idea where it was going

A harsh tone of feeling
Breaks through
A coughing laugh
That came from somewhere
Back and to the left

I could not see where
You had come from
I just knew
I should be there
Either in your presence
Or your absence

Knowing you will be back
Knowing I will see you soon

A jerking journey
Through red mist and ether
Moistens my flesh
It will be dry by morning

Where I will wake with a start
Throat and face bone dry
And my greatest trip
Begins again
Breaking up a conversation
I was having with myself

— GLB

pins and needles

pins and needles pierce
my eyes and bring a
pain that is nothing
compared to what I feel
when I see you standing
in the rain alone when I
could have been there
wrapping my arms around
you and keeping you warm

etch my disappointment
on my face when i reach
for you and fall short
mud and briers fill my
fists, crawling after you
I break myself on every
boulder, drown in every
stream, my life is left
anticipating the moment
I catch you and hold
you and know that
you are mine

— GB

there is poison in that needle

there is poison in that needle
but I am already strapped
down to this gurney, I know
what comes next, but I have
never experienced it before

lightning from the electrodes
goes shooting into my brain
electric fingers pinch, poke, and
prod all they can reach, stirring
the gray matter around breaking
down the dearest memories,
leaving others in tact, there is
no rhyme or reason which it is

— GB

start and stop

start and stop
bottom to top
where can I go
to get where I
want to get
what I need
how do I stop
I need to start
coming home
to loved ones
who will take
care of me
until I can stop
needing it and
start helping me
take care of
myself

start to stop
growing into
a knot in my
stomach to
ensure I am
done with it
praising all
who have given
up parts of
their lives
for me to get
out of the
place I was
in

thank you
thank you
thank you

— GB